Classroom Community

This is part of a website developed by Dr. Ross Greene

What is Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (CPS)?

The key premise of CPS is that children do the best they can with the skills they’ve got.  When we encounter difficulties, it’s up to the adults to identify and teach skills that our children are lacking.  

A Summary of the Collaborative & Proactive Solutions Method

Identify Something You’ve Noticed

Identify something you’ve noticed without blame or judgement.  

“Hey buddy, I noticed you had a hard time when your friend wasn’t following the rules in that game. What’s up?”  

Listen

Give them a chance to explain their perception of what is happening.  Do not interrupt and do not correct their version of events.  

Empathize

Empathize with the child’s experience and validate their feelings.  

ie. “It’s very frustrating when someone isn’t playing fair. Sounds like that made you pretty angry. I sometimes feel frustrated when someone isn’t playing fair too.” 

Identify Your Concern

Identify your concern — without blame or judgement.  Explain your concern without labelling the child or their behaviour, and without making assumptions.  

“My concern is that when you raise your voice at other kids, it makes them feel unsafe, and everyone has less fun, including you. I want everyone to feel safe and have fun.” 

Child’s Concerns

Ask the child to identify any concerns they have.  

Ask them if they have any suggestions or ideas for ways you can work together to solve the problem.  Invite them to be part of the solution.  

Invite the Child

Ask them if they have any suggestions for ways you can work together to solve the problem.  

“What do you think we can do to solve this problem together?”  

This includes actions that can be taken both by the children and the adults.  

Check-in & Summarize

Check in with the child at the end of the conversation:

• How are you feeling about our conversation?

• Do you think our plan is fair?  

• Do you think we can all try those ideas and see how they go?

• It’s okay if they don’t work perfectly, we can always make adjustments if we find things aren’t working for us.  

CPS Info & Resources

For more information on the Collaborative & Proactive Solutions model, visit the Lives in the Balance website.

In this system, the teacher has clothing pins, one for each student. Everyone starts in the green zone as they enter class in the morning. If the teacher notices behaviours that belong in any of these colour-coded zones, the teacher moves that student’s pin into that section.

Again, this is often done in front of the entire class. Sometimes this happens while the teacher interrupts her lesson to walk over to the chart, and moves someone’s pin while all the students watch, humiliating the child whose pin gets moved into one of the “warning” or “bad” zones.

Children whose pins spend a lot of time in the lower half of these charts are often labelled as “problem” kids, even if teachers never say anything like that out loud.

Children are smart, they notice patterns, and they observe exactly how the adults treat and respond to the children around them. Whether intended or not, peers begin to zero on on the so-called “bad” kids and now those children are developing reputations, sometimes as early as Kindergarten.

They Undermine Intrinsic Motivation

Children whose behaviours are constantly being manipulated by external factors, namely adults imposing punishments and doling out rewards, end up being reliant on tangible evidence of their “goodness”.

“Incentives like sticker charts, consequences, and other forms of adult monitoring that are “laid on” children actually undermine their self-motivation… Rewards can erode self-generated interest and lead to interest only in the reward itself.” — Stixrud & Johnson

This can rob children of the ability to be kind for the sake of being kind, or because it simply feels nice to do things for others, and of the ability to see themselves and their choices as positive without needing someone else to affirm this for them.

“External motivators can reinforce the idea that someone other than the child is responsible for their life… relying on someone else’s pronouncement that they are worthy or smart.” — Stixrud & Johnson

They Cause Anxiety & Unhealthy Competition

Students in classrooms that operate in this way can become fixated on achieving and receiving the promised rewards, to the point where they are very distressed or upset when they do not succeed.

There are even some behaviour management programs that outright pit students against one another. For example, the class may be divided into groups of students to avoid individual competition, in an attempt to promote “positive peer pressure” and teamwork.

If the group with the most points at the end of the week wins a prize, then how do students treat each other when someone is responsible for their group missing out on points, or not winning the prize? How does that student feel when their classmates are blaming them for losing a point or missing out on a reward?

“The central message of all competition is that everyone else is a potential obstacle to one’s own success.” — Alfie Kohn

Not-so-positive peer pressure, I would say.

Little Room for Error (aka being Human)

As an adult, have you ever gotten away with doing something you weren’t supposed to? I know I have. For example, I’ve been late for an appointment and drove over the speed limit, but was lucky enough to not get a speeding ticket. I got away with speeding, which is a potentially dangerous behaviour.

When children are under near-constant adult supervision, they are often called out on just about every single mistake they make, and this frequently happens in front of their peers.

Even worse, children who struggle to conform to school behaviour expectations are often under the microscope more than their peers. Not only are they already singled out because of their neurological or behavioural differences, they are watched more carefully, and then further alienated because their misdeeds certainly don’t get missed.

Lastly, when adults are constantly directing and controlling children’s behaviour, they don’t have the opportunity to develop self-monitoring and self-management skills… because someone is always doing that for them.

They are Manipulative

“Behaviour management is about the adults.” — Dr. Lori Desautels

These behaviour management programs, however positively framed, are primarily about controlling the behaviour of children in an attempt to make the adults’ lives easier.

Unfortunately, this often misses the point, and sometimes makes things worse instead of better.

“Although adult-imposed consequences might be effective at modifying a student’s behaviours, they don’t solve the problems that are causing those behaviours.” — Dr. Ross Greene

I get it, honestly, I do. I am the parent of a neurodivergent child. He’s an only child, but sometimes his energy levels and support needs make it feel like I have at least five children.

I’ve worked in schools and in classrooms geared primarily for neurodiverse children. I cannot imagine trying to provide an education to a room of 30 children, as well as trying to keep the chaos to a minimum. Truly.

That said, when we use rewards and consequences just to get the behaviour we want from children, we are indeed manipulating them for our own benefit. However it may seem to also be for our own sanity, it’s not ethical, and does not teach children the tools and skills they need. In fact, it can often backfire, especially with differently wired kids.

“When they feel forced, kids resist even things that are helpful to them in order to gain a sense of control.” — Stixrud & Johnson

Nobody likes to feel manipulated or forced into anything, but I think this is especially true for neurodivergent people. I know I’m heckin’ stubborn and never want to be told what to do. So much so, I wrote a separate article all about Power Trips Lead to Power Struggles - Our Expert Advice for Avoiding Power Struggles, Particularly with Neurodiverse Kids

“When a teacher is sitting in judgement of what you do, and if that judgement will determine whether good things or bad things happen to you, this cannot help but warp your relationship with that person.” — Alfie Kohn

They are Reactive, Not Proactive

Rewards and consequences happen after a behaviour has already occurred. If a student behaves in a way their teacher does not like, having their clothes pin moved, or missing out on a sticker only reacts to the surface behaviour.

“Rewards do not require any attention to the reasons that the trouble developed in the first place.” — Alfie Kohn

If children struggle to meet their school or classroom expectations, then rewards and consequences are only going to make the child feel poorly about themselves. As I’ve said before, punishments don’t teach skills. Often they only blame and shame.

“By the time a concerning behaviour occurs, you’re in crisis management mode… and behaviour modification strategies don’t solve any problems.” — Dr. Ross Greene

What Can We Do Instead?

We can engage in Collaborative and Proactive Solutions (CPS), a child-centred problem-solving model developed by Dr. Ross Greene. We dig deep, with the child leading the way, to uncover the underlying causes of concerning behaviours.

We empathize with and validate children’s feelings and experiences, and work with them to come up with strategies that will work for them. I have written a number of articles on these topics as well:

• Help with Challenging Behaviours in Children - Help and advice for supporting our children and working through challenging behaviours.

• Kinder, More Effective Alternatives to Punishment - Kinder, More Effective Alternatives to Punishment: How we can guide children and set appropriate boundaries without…

• The Power of Validation - A profound way to strengthen the parent-child relationship